Keeping the Merry in Merry Christmas as a Couple

Whether you are dating, engaged, newly married, or have been together for years, the holidays can be tough. Holiday stress can come from buying gifts, spending money, setting expectations, dividing your time, planning travel, and figuring out how to see both families. With all this going on, it can be hard to find joy and celebrate together as a couple. Don’t let the holiday rush get in the way of your relationship or put a damper on your marriage.

Here are five ways to help you and your spouse keep the joy in Christmas this year.

1. Make a Budget

Ideally, you already have a budget. If not, check out our resource page for some helpful tools.

It’s also important to set a separate holiday budget. December’s budget is different from the rest of the year. If you start shopping before making a Christmas budget, you might end up feeling stressed and short on money. Don’t let this season turn into a race to keep up with others.

Discuss what you can spend before you start shopping. Decide together what’s most important. Gifts, travel, food, decorations, parties, and traditions can add up fast. Having a budget helps you stay in control so money worries don’t take over.

2. Hold Your Tongue

It’s not always easy, but choosing your words carefully can mean the difference between a peaceful holiday and a big argument with family. Christmas isn’t the best time to bring up drama or start arguments with in-laws. Try to be mindful of what you say so everyone can enjoy the holiday. Remember, the holidays are short, and emotions run high. How you feel in December won’t last forever. Pause before you respond. Let some things go. Show grace when possible. Protect your peace and your relationship.

3. Plan Romantic Winter Dates

Don’t skip date nights this season. It might sound nice to stay wrapped up in a blanket all winter, but don’t miss out on winter activities. If you’re staying in, try lighting the fireplace, having a romantic dinner, or slow dancing by the Christmas tree. If you want to go out, look for places to drive through Christmas lights, go ice skating downtown, grab hot chocolate, walk through your city center, or take a horse and carriage ride. Have fun turning those cheesy Hallmark movies into real memories together.

4. Find Excitement in Tradition

Let go of traditions that make the holidays feel boring or routine. If you’re newlyweds, you might feel like there are things you have to do. But this is a great time to make your own list. You get to choose how you celebrate, who you visit, and how you spend your time.

Don’t feel stuck. Pick traditions you actually look forward to, whether it’s decorating, baking, or storytelling. Change up old traditions or create new ones that blend both of your childhoods. The goal isn’t to do everything the way it’s always been done. It’s about building a meaningful holiday rhythm together.

5. Plan Instead of avoiding the holiday, join in the fun.

Plan a Christmas brunch with friends or a Secret Santa gift exchange with your small group at church. Host an event that has you looking forward to celebrating, especially if you do not typically enjoy every family gathering. When you host your own event, you decide what you do, how it feels, and who’s there. Play games, make fun food, and relax while celebrating with friends or family.

Sometimes planning just one event you’re excited about can make the whole season feel lighter. Enjoy time with your spouse and loved ones this holiday season.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Blog post written by my daughter, Elizabeth Squirek. Check out her blog at https://somethingtoowineabout.wordpress.com/

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Photo by Elina Fairytale

Photo by Jonathan Borba

Photo by Şahin Sezer Dinçer